I wake up in the morning give thanks for my life and connect to my Higher Self, get out of bed, have my coffee with my hair all askew, wait for the “movement”, brush my teeth, go to the gym for my hour and half workout, come home and fix a smoothie or juice something, hit the showers, put myself together in a way that when I look in the mirror I’m seeing myself like I want to feel, pack my lunch, feed my critters and hop in the car to head to work! I know that was a long sentence but this represents how most of my mornings begin.
After a full day meeting with people (I’ll be mostly speaking about this in a minute), I head home. I shoot my partner and best friend a call to see what he’s thinking about for dinner. We mutually decide, or if one of us is ambitious, will already have it covered. Come home, eat, watch a bit of TV and go to bed to read. I get my needed 7 hours of beauty rest and then start it all over again at 4:45 am the next morning.
It’s what happens in the middle that I want to talk about. The full day of meeting with people that is. I’m not sure I can even really put it into words, which is how it usually works with what I’m about to try to describe. I am not a Social Worker by degree, nor am I a Psychologist by degree either (I actually spelled psychologist right on the first try! Yay me!). I have been a self proclaimed “spiritual life coach” for several years after having experienced some pretty amazing things that you will not find in any college text books. I have a very keen sense of what will resonate with the people that come through my office and cross my path. This is because it’s very simple but oh so scary! I teach and reflect the message of LOVE. You see, I know the truth about people. I know that they come from a perfect energy of Divine love. They have a hidden spark inside them that has been so buried under bullshit, conditioning, abuse, rejection, abandonment, neglect, expectations and false beliefs that they have forgotten their own perfection and unique place in this human experience.
Somehow over the years I have come to understand that “Source”, “God”, “Christ Energy”, “Pure Love”, “The Higher Power/Self” (call “IT” whatever you want) shows up THROUGH me if and when there is a chance that whoever is sitting across from me is possibly ready to hear what comes through me in the hour we spend together. When this happens there is so much love in the room, emanating from me, reflecting out of me as a picture, or perhaps a feeling that is so foreign to most, that it initially cannot be understood and it can feel confusing. Almost always though, someone will be brought to tears at some point, not understanding where the hell those tears are coming from. They will sometimes express to me that they cannot “figure me out”. Something, with what it being offered, feels so out of the norm yet feels so perfectly in alignment for them that it is confusing. This is where their heart experiences a pinhole of light that is shining on the TRUTH about who they are. Since they have been taught to let the outer experiences they are having define them, this feeling is not trusted at first. They either run like hell and never look back or they can’t wait to come back to investigate more.
The thing that is so difficult for me is that this has literally nothing to do with ME and everything to do with “Source” showing up and using me as a medium/tool/vehicle to do so. I know when this is happening and you can call me crazy or kooky or whatever you want. It doesn’t matter to me and over the years I have come to understand “IT” and the process so fully that it no longer confuses me at all and I have no need for acknowledgement or validation. When this first happened, when I first realized something greater than me was taking place, it was happening FOR me as much as through me and opened my heart in a way that I was not prepared for, nor did I have any inkling of what was to come. So I was learning right along with the person that I was helping. Miracles happened and I shifted in a way that forever changed the course of my life. I still learn so much and expand in beautiful ways every time this amazing perfect “Energy” shows up THROUGH me but I know now what’s happening and get to bask in the perfect feeling of LOVE, human connection and compassion. What a gift this is! What a gift the people who come into my path that I get to reflect to, for they are a reflection of me as well. I get to see myself through their eyes too.
I’ve been asked by many why I’m not a counselor (I can never spell counselor right on the first try. Thank God for spell check). Why am I not a Psychologist? “You’re so good at it” I’m told. I find this hilarious. I take it as a compliment as I know it’s intended to be however, what difference would it make? Would I be more ethical because of the degree? Would I be more effective in my delivery? This is the part that slays me honestly. Now, before I go off and offend any of you Social Workers or Psychologists, I want you to know that this is not my point. I honor the work you do and you cover the things that I do not that make any mental health service that you offer complete. I just feel like what I do cannot have rules and regulations attached to it. While I know boundaries probably better than anyone and realize that to stay in a space that is healthy and supporting the persons “highest good” that there are some lines that cannot and should not be crossed. Good and clear communication is usually the answer to this. However, pure love should not be regulated. I cannot be told who I can love, how much I can love and whether I am right or wrong to love, by anyone but me and that clear knowing/nudging from the presence of God. I won’t be told rather and instead follow my heart in giving without attachment to outcome or expectation of any kind. This is referred to authentic and unconditional love.
We are all part of the infinite puzzle in the infinite multi-layers of the infinite Universe. What one person does, feels, thinks etc. affects the WHOLE. It is important to me that I honor this knowing and reflect people’s “truth” back to them. I do this mainly because I love myself. It makes perfect sense to want to be as healthy as possible to enjoy this gift of life that I have been given. To fully embrace the experience, the very short experience that it is in this physical body called “Linda”. I take pretty good care of myself. I believe in practicing self awareness. I do this by taking the effort to eat right, I exercise, I meditate and connect multiple times a day to the God within me. My “Higher Self”, that part of me who is perfect “Love”. I believe in BALANCE. I don’t operate or coach from a text book set of rules or regulations. I coach from a place of LOVE and connection to “Source/Myself/Others” (it’s all the same – IT’s connected). There are no college courses that cover this. I don’t want to be limited or have to check my set of “rules” when “Source” is present. There should never be rules around loving others purely. That goes against who we truly are. Who we are when we come into this human existence and who we are when we go out. If this makes me “dangerous” in others eyes then so be it. I cannot have it any other way. It’s who I AM.
Some (well most) might be uncomfortable but strangely drawn to this level of “coaching”. Sometimes when Linda shows back up after “Love” has spoken through me it is uncomfortable for me as well but so absolutely purifying. I’m sometimes like “Damn! Really? That was awesome but now what? The person hearing this might not understand that this was not me at all. Good God help me make them understand! Yet at some level they often do and there’s never an issue. I’ve been given the gift of a good vocabulary around it and can make it feel safe.
It’s such a flippin’ shame that we have to worry about emanating love. That we have to worry about the “rules” and staying safe. It’s messed up really. Considering we are all “Love” at our very core, this holding back goes against us. This is why there is so much “dis-ease” in the world. This is the very separation of our own Spirit from the God within each and every one of us causing the heart ache and the dysfunction. The social conditioning of that we are separate from the very “God” we are taught to worship. Ack! It makes me insane to even talk about it. My coaching screams “this is not so!” It screams from the depths of my Being, “Wake UP! You are Powerful! There is no need to look outside of yourself for God. Look within first and then look at the beautiful bird flying overhead, look at the infinite blades of grass you are standing upon, look into the eyes of your neighbor, look under a rock, “IT” is there, “IT” is everywhere. LOOK in the MIRROR! See your own Divine perfect self!!!
My message to them is this: The creative power lies within you! What you are seeing in/through me is creating the feeling of love you are experiencing, but the TRUTH is, this is a reflection of the parts of YOURSELF that you love that you have forgotten about and now, at some level, you are remembering. This has nothing to do with me! You are only seeing YOURSELF through my eyes. When “The Higher Power” is present, you are seeing yourself through the eyes of “God”.
There is no label to this kind of love. It is not the love of romance, friendship, family etc. It is the love of “Christ Consciousness”. It is a love that has no definition but is the creative force that is our very existence.
Humans need labels. They need to understand things that “make sense” to them in this physical form. Most people are spiritually immature only because they’ve never been shown their own beauty at this level. Needing to box in this indescribable feeling of love makes people more comfortable. Trying to define this love as something that tangibly makes sense only diminishes and releases the depth of the experience. It’s something that should just be basked in and appreciated and enjoyed and honored.
So back to the subject of “I’m Love Disguised as Human”. Being human, I need to sleep, to eat and I “poop” just like everyone else (gross I know but, you get the point right?…). I catch myself in judgment of others and I get grouchy and I’m sometimes not at my best. I get stressed, feel sad, get angry, cuss and am inappropriate at times. I yearn for companionship and deeply appreciate family, friends, animals and nature. I am special but no more special than each and everyone one else. The thing that makes me expand beyond the physical experience is my relationship and awareness to “Love, God, Source, Breath”. I love this Human experience and cherish all of it. Even the bullshit, for it’s that polarity to the good that allows me this human experience at all.
So, I am human but I know that I AM also LOVE and it is my hope that in some way that I reflect back to you your beauty and perfection with my words… maybe someday I will reflect with my eyes should our paths get to cross. So I will end in thoughts of sending you much uncensored and unconditional LOVE my fellow Beings. We are but a thought away from being ONE in love.
Linda ~ https://www.lightupmysoul.com